Daughters of Sarah

Despite what many people have been led to believe, the Bible never commands us to look to Mary (the mother of Jesus) as an example of a godly woman. The Bible also never commands us to praise Mary, worship her, sing songs to her, or pray to her. In fact, the one time someone in the Bible tried to praise Mary, the Lord Jesus Christ immediately stopped her:

Luke 11:27: “And it came to pass, as he spake these things, a certain woman of the company lifted up her voice, and said unto him, Blessed is the womb that bare thee, and the paps which thou hast sucked.
28 But he said, Yea rather, blessed are they that hear the word of God, and keep it.”

Notice how Christ simply did not allow the adoration of Mary. He immediately corrected this woman and said that the people who are truly blessed are those who hear the word of God and keep it. Jesus was not a fan of Mary worship.

This does not mean that the Scriptures contains no good role models for women. There is someone that the Bible holds up as an example for other women to follow. That person is Sarah, the wife of Abraham:

Isaiah 51:2: “Look unto Abraham your father, and unto Sarah that bare you: for I called him alone, and blessed him, and increased him.”

The apostle Peter has a lot more to say about this. He explains why Sarah was such a good role model:

I Peter 3:1: “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.”

What Peter is saying is this: the reason Sarah makes such a great role model is because she submitted herself to her husband Abraham and obeyed him. Women are to submit themselves to their husbands and Sarah did exactly that; therefore, she is a role model for other women. Those who follow her example are daughters of Sarah.

There are two facts about this subject that amaze me. The first fact is that the Bible is very clear about God’s will for both men and women. Neither gender is left guessing about what God wants them to do or how God wants them to behave. The fact is that many modern women are completely opposed to what God has told them, to the point where many pastors are terrified of this subject and avoid it. I’m not just talking about lost women here; many women who claim to be Christians have rejected God’s will for their lives. They know what the Bible teaches and they know what God has said, and they have rejected it. They are not interested. They have knowingly and deliberately chosen a life of rebellion, and they are proud of that choice. I honestly believe that many women would rather die than humble themselves before God and obey His commands. They are just never going to do it.

Before we get off-track, let me be clear that the real issue here is whether we will humble ourselves before God and obey Him. When God gives us a command, the only issue is whether we will obey it or whether we will disobey it and rebel against Him. Are we willing to submit ourselves to God and do what He has said, or are we going to reject His authority and do what we want instead? The issue is not “Women are disobeying their husbands”; instead, it is “God has commanded women to obey their husbands, and women have refused”. The disobedience is to God – as is the case with all sin.

For the record, God has been quite clear about His views on the roles of men and women, and His words contain instructions for both genders. This is what the Bible has to say to husbands:

Ephesians 5:25: “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; …
28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”

Colossians 3:19: “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.”

I Peter 3:7: “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”

Men are commanded to love their wives – even if the cost is very high. Interestingly, there is no organized movement among men to overthrow these verses. Christian men have not formed groups and shouted to the world that they will never love their wives. Pastors do not hesitate to preach these verses and hold men to account. No one is afraid of condemning men for their sins, and no one trembles at the thought of bringing up these passages and publicly rebuking the male sex. For their part, Christian men do try to love their wives as best they can. This is not to say that men are sinless or that all men do this perfectly, but I will say that it is pretty much impossible to find a Christian man who will say “I refuse to love my wife and I am proud of it.” It just doesn’t happen.

The Bible is equally clear about God’s will for wives. They are to submit themselves to their husbands:

Ephesians 5:22: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.”

Some people claim that this is a “mutual submission” situation, where the husband and wife submit to each other, but that is utter nonsense. These verses are very simple to understand: the husband is the head of the wife. He is in charge. The wife is under his authority, and she is to submit to her husband in every thing and obey him. He is the leader and is commanded to love her; she is the follower (or First Officer, if you would rather look at it that way) and is commanded to obey him.

Why is this the case? Because women were actually created for men:

I Corinthians 11:7: “For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, forasmuch as he is the image and glory of God: but the woman is the glory of the man.
8 For the man is not of the woman: but the woman of the man.
9 Neither was the man created for the woman; but the woman for the man.”

This goes back to Creation itself: women were created from men and for men. Few people would dare say this today – even in churches – but it is the truth. (The fact that some truths are no longer welcome even in church is a very bad thing. When did the truth become unacceptable to the people of God? Do we not realize that He is greatly dishonored when we view His Words with distaste and unease?)

God repeats the idea that wives should submit themselves to their husbands:

Colossians 3:18: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.”

And He repeats it again – this time through the apostle Peter (lest anyone say “It was all Paul’s idea”):

I Peter 3:1: “Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:”

God commands wives to have a meek and quiet spirit; they are to honor Him by obeying their husbands. The commandment is clear, simple, and direct. There is nothing murky or uncertain about it.

The Lord is also clear about women’s role in church:

I Timothy 2:11: “Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.
12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
13 For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.
15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.”

Inside the church, women are not allowed to have positions of authority over men; it is strictly forbidden. They may not be pastors or deacons. Once again we see that God has given the authority to men and has commanded women to submit.

Many women, however, will not obey these commands. They utterly and passionately reject them. They are not concerned about God’s will for their lives; instead, they want their will and their way. They want their husbands to keep their part (“You have to love me the way Christ loved the church!”), but they would rather die than keep their end of the deal (“I will never, ever submit to you. Ever.”). In fact, their rejection of these commands is so strong that many pastors avoid this topic entirely – and if they do teach on it, they water it down beyond recognition or preach it on a night when no one is there.

Women have come up with many ways to attack these verses, but none of their arguments have any merit. Some people claim “I can’t obey my husband! What if he asks me to kill someone?” This is nonsense – for a host of reasons. First of all, it is an absurd corner case. There is not an epidemic of husbands out there who are trying to lure their wives into a life of crime. Colossians 3:18 makes it quite clear that this submission does not include committing crimes. Besides, this is a false argument. When women say this they never mean “Well, I’ll obey my husbands in everything except committing crimes”. What they really mean is this: “How dare you suggest I should submit myself to my husband! No one has the right to tell me what to do.” What really upsets women is the idea that their husband has authority over them. Corner cases like this are just a cheap excuse to reject a very clear and direct commandment.

There are other people who say “Well, the apostles were wrong. They hated women. Besides, their views on relationships are old and outdated.” This is also a false argument, because the people who are making it don’t actually believe it. How do we know this? Because the very women who say these things still demand that their husbands love them. They never say “Since I’m rejecting what Paul says to wives, it’s ok for my husband to reject what he says to husbands”. While they reject their part of the deal, they still claim that Paul’s commandments to their husbands are binding. Once again, the real issue is the fact that they don’t like these commandments. If the apostles had said something more to their liking then the argument would never have been made in the first place.

It is utter madness to reject the authority of all of the apostles just because you don’t like what they taught. Not only did these apostles have Jesus Christ’s personal stamp of approval, but God used these men to do incredible things like raise the dead. There are no grounds for claiming that God wasn’t with them or that their writings were not inspired. The Bible is the Word of God and its every word (in both the Old and New Testament) is perfect and infallible; those who reject it are in rebellion against God, and God does not take that lightly. You simply do not have the right to go through the Bible and toss out the parts you don’t like – nor do you have the right to throw out the commandments of God that are distasteful to you.

If we were all honest with each other, the issue really boils down to this: some people don’t like some of the things that God has said and so they’ve rejected those things. It’s really not any more complicated than that. When they had to choose between what they wanted and what God commanded, they chose themselves over God. That decision, however, is a very momentous one. It is a frightening thing to look God in the eye and say “I refuse to obey You”. The apostle John explains why:

I John 2:3: “And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments.
4 He that saith, I know him, and keepeth not his commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him.
5 But whoso keepeth his word, in him verily is the love of God perfected: hereby know we that we are in him.”

As you can see, one of the hallmarks of a true Christian is that he obeys the commandments of God. This doesn’t mean that he always obeys them perfectly or that he never sins; instead it means that he has wholly submitted himself to God’s authority and is always seeking to obey God more perfectly. When he sins he repents and seeks forgiveness and grace; he loathes his sin and fights it and longs to be made more like his sinless Savior. He is always on guard against sin, and as he comes to understand the Word better he changes his life to more perfectly honor God. All true Christians have the same point of view: “Yes, Lord Jesus, you are in charge. You are my king. You call the shots; I will do as you say. I have no will of my own; my only will is to serve and honor You.” Those who refuse to do this – those who stand up and say “I refuse to obey You” – do not know God. They are not of Him. This type of rebellion comes from a heart that has rejected the lordship of Christ, and that rebellion is fatal. As Christians you cannot tell God no. You do not have that option. In fact, as Christians, that very thought should be unthinkable and should fill us with utter horror. Those who live a life of casually dismissing God and doing their own will simply do not know Him at all. They are not His.

Now, I am not saying that our works save us; that is not the issue at all. The real problem is that we can only be saved if Jesus is our Savior and our Lord. If we utterly reject His authority then we are lost. If we say “I know the commandments of God and I reject them; I am going to do what I want instead”, then we are lost. That road leads straight to Hell. Our sins cannot take away our salvation because our salvation cannot be lost; however, if we have never humbled ourselves before God and submitted to His authority then we have never been saved at all.

True believers act very differently when they hear the words of God. King Josiah is a great example of this. When he heard the commands of God he responded with repentance:

2 Kings 22:11: “And it came to pass, when the king had heard the words of the book of the law, that he rent his clothes.
12 And the king commanded Hilkiah the priest, and Ahikam the son of Shaphan, and Achbor the son of Michaiah, and Shaphan the scribe, and Asahiah a servant of the king’s, saying,
13 Go ye, enquire of the Lord for me, and for the people, and for all Judah, concerning the words of this book that is found: for great is the wrath of the Lord that is kindled against us, because our fathers have not hearkened unto the words of this book, to do according unto all that which is written concerning us.”

When King Josiah heard the Law he trembled and was afraid. He was greatly upset, because he knew that his people had not kept it and he knew that God was not to be trifled with. Josiah quaked before the words of God. The Lord honored this, and spoke comforting words to Josiah:

2 Chronicles 34:27: “Because thine heart was tender, and thou didst humble thyself before God, when thou heardest his words against this place, and against the inhabitants thereof, and humbledst thyself before me, and didst rend thy clothes, and weep before me; I have even heard thee also, saith the Lord.
28 Behold, I will gather thee to thy fathers, and thou shalt be gathered to thy grave in peace, neither shall thine eyes see all the evil that I will bring upon this place, and upon the inhabitants of the same. So they brought the king word again.”

When we tremble before God and humble ourselves, He will hear and forgive us. He will change our lives and make us His. However, there are many who refuse to humble themselves before God. They have a very different reaction to His Word, as we can see in the case of King Jehoiakim:

Jeremiah 36:22: “Now the king sat in the winterhouse in the ninth month: and there was a fire on the hearth burning before him.
23 And it came to pass, that when Jehudi had read three or four leaves, he cut it with the penknife, and cast it into the fire that was on the hearth, until all the roll was consumed in the fire that was on the hearth.
24 Yet they were not afraid, nor rent their garments, neither the king, nor any of his servants that heard all these words.
25 Nevertheless Elnathan and Delaiah and Gemariah had made intercession to the king that he would not burn the roll: but he would not hear them.”

When God, in His great mercy, sent a warning to King Jehoiakim, the king did not humble himself as Josiah had. No, this king was not concerned. He didn’t care what God had to say and he placed no value on His words. He just cut up the scroll and threw the pieces into the fire, as if they were some kind of garbage. Needless to say, God was not amused:

Jeremiah 36:27: “Then the word of the Lord came to Jeremiah, after that the king had burned the roll, and the words which Baruch wrote at the mouth of Jeremiah, saying,
28 Take thee again another roll, and write in it all the former words that were in the first roll, which Jehoiakim the king of Judah hath burned.
29 And thou shalt say to Jehoiakim king of Judah, Thus saith the Lord; Thou hast burned this roll, saying, Why hast thou written therein, saying, The king of Babylon shall certainly come and destroy this land, and shall cause to cease from thence man and beast?
30 Therefore thus saith the Lord of Jehoiakim king of Judah; He shall have none to sit upon the throne of David: and his dead body shall be cast out in the day to the heat, and in the night to the frost.
31 And I will punish him and his seed and his servants for their iniquity; and I will bring upon them, and upon the inhabitants of Jerusalem, and upon the men of Judah, all the evil that I have pronounced against them; but they hearkened not.”

God honored King Josiah, who humbled himself and submitted to the Lord, and He cursed King Jehoiakim, who trashed His Word and treated it like garbage. God has not changed; that is still His policy.

The real issue here is not a wife’s rebellion against her husband; instead it is an individual’s rebellion against God. No Christian has the right to tell God no, and no Christian is allowed to remove from the Bible the passages that they don’t like. Any time a person stands up and rejects the words of God, they are in trouble. When a person has made the decision that they will not obey God – that they will knowingly and deliberately reject the express commandment of God and do their own thing instead – then they are doing exactly what King Jehoiakim did. It is one thing for a Christian to strive to obey God and fail; it is an entirely different thing to look at God and say “How dare you tell me what to do!” That is a very serious matter.

Those who humble themselves before God and submit to Him will find mercy, as Josiah did. Likewise, those who trash His word and reject it will face His wrath. Those are your only two options.